How To Identify Your Core Needs In a Relationship?

Core Needs In a Relationship

Our lives revolve around relationships because we all want to love, feel loved, and appreciated. But these are not the only things that define our core needs in a romantic relationship.

And the problem is that it’s difficult to identify what exactly one wants from their partner since we don’t really think about our needs while being with someone.

 This leads us to conflicts and chaos, which is why it is very important to be clear about your expectations and needs from both your partner and your relationship.

This will help you avoid romantic disappointments, and it will be much easier to gravitate toward the right partners instead of fumbling around an unknown path.

There are so many ways to start identifying your relationship needs, but first, you need to be able to categorize them because there are several types of needs that we as humans expect from our loved ones.

What Are The Core Needs in a Relationship?

Core Needs In a Relationship

We can start by categorizing these core needs in a relationship, such as physical, emotional, financial, etc.

However, most of the needs in a relationship are psychological, and you can spot them as affection which might include romantic gestures, sex, words full of love, etc. 

Then there is respect that the majority of people seek in a relationship, and appreciation is one more such need which comprises gestures like receiving gratitude and praise.

Other basic but core needs in a relationship are security, loyalty, trust, and emotional support. All these needs work on a priority basis that you get to decide. 

Essentially everyone has to identify their core needs in a relationship since they may differ from person to person. We all have a different hierarchy of needs and values in a relationship.

We might appreciate some basic fundamental aspects of life and relationships, but their importance may vary from person to person.

How to Determine Your Core Needs in a Relationship?

To understand with whom to engage in life or who to give an entry ticket to your life, you need to identify and understand your core needs in a relationship.

You also need to understand if the other person is capable of meeting your needs; otherwise, you will end up losing yourself in a relationship and doing things that you don’t enjoy doing. 

We have compiled a list of methods that can help you identify/determine your core needs in a relationship.

Track Down Your Love Language

Core Needs In a Relationship

Once you identify your love language, it will be easy for you to understand your core needs in a relationship. There are several love languages, like physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, and acts of service. 

To find out which one is your love language, you can pick one that’s important to you. For example, if your love language is words of affirmation, that means you need emotional support from your partner.

If your love language is quality time, this means you seek attachment.

Figure Out What Makes You Happy Or Sad/Mad

Core Needs In a Relationship

This is a very simple method, and all you have to do is start identifying the things that make you happy or things that you enjoy. If you figure that out, you can surely come up with a list of your needs in a relationship.

 Sometimes you can’t really figure out what exactly makes you happy. In this situation, you can follow a reverse approach where you will note down things that make you unhappy, sad, or mad, things that are unacceptable for you in a relationship.

This technique will help you simplify your core needs in a relationship, and you will certainly identify them.

Try To Set Your Priorities

Core Needs In a Relationship

Setting your priorities is important because no matter how badly you strive for perfection, you won’t find a partner who can fulfill all your core needs in a relationship.

 It is fine to have many standards, but it’s important that you concentrate your needs on their importance. It is an effective way to avoid becoming unrealistically over-demanding with your partner.

Be Open Regarding Your Needs

Core Needs In a Relationship

The conversation is an effective way to understand your partner better, and it’s important to communicate your needs and demands to your partner.

You should never leave them guessing and wondering about what you want because they are not God to understand what’s going inside your head. So, it’s better that you start mentioning your needs clearly.

And it will be great if you are able to communicate your core needs to your partner at the beginning of your relationship, so you two come to an understanding before jumping in.

Try To Analyse Your Current Relationship

Core Needs In a Relationship

If you are presently in a relationship, you can analyze your relationship closely. Try to understand your partner’s behavior, their love language, your love language, your behavior, etc

.Check up on the pattern that you two have been following and point out things like things or gestures that are the most important to both of you or certain needs that are similar, or likings and dislikings that are similar.

This will help you make a better understanding with your partner, and the core needs in a relationship will automatically start showing, and you can work on them together.

The Bottom Line

Relationships differ from person to person, and there can be countless deciding factors about that. You need to stick to what works for you and what your and your partner’s core needs are.

Never compare your relationship/partner with someone else’s relationship/partner.

 What works for you might not work for them, and what works for them may not work for you. 

Always remember that the core needs in a relationship keep changing and shuffling with time, so you might have to adjust equivalently and accordingly.

Also read: 12 Traits Of A Narcissist